corrections

• As far as I can tell, the Great Red Spot has existed for as long as astronomers have been looking, but its color changes slightly from time to time.
• It was Hilary Clinton, not Bill, who (apocryphally?) overdosed on fondue. 
• The restaurant I was thinking of is called Helmand, not the Khyber Pass.
• The suicide rate in Alaska (and, for that matter, a variety of states that I would group together as 'lonely') have rates of suicide about the same as northern-European countries. However, suicide if often under-reported, or just generally mis-reported, so I wouldn't draw any conclusions about the 'livability' of these regions; it is not without the realm of possibility that a large part of the change could be due to Scandanavians keep better statistics, or that Alaska just had an unlucky couple of years.